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Somewhere between the
fourth glass of Bacardi white rum and 5th cigarette of the
night my blurred vision got active and I started to notice the room im stuck in
from the past one hour. My derriere gives a thumb up to the soft cushion
holding it and im finally starting to feel my freedom peeking her head with a
grin.After endless waiting
for a job its time to give up hope and let my hair down. Staying with parents,
waiting for placements since forever has taken a toll on my emotional stability.
Anyhow back to the
basic reason for my drinking spree today is my joblessness. In 15 days I will
turn 24. I’m gonna be 24, fat, jobless and sexless which is quite a sad
combination. Relatives treat me like a cancer patient. Just yesterday one of my
relative called me and started crying on phone, apparently she is really sad
that I dint get a job as I was raised to be the saint who would help my parents
to upper-class family benefits. my parents already earn quite good i wonder why they want me to do anything for me... where is the good old rule of being independent gone? She
could not control her tears and I could not control my rage. unconditional expectations are a pain in the wrong place, I know my parents expected this from me but they should
know my DNA doesn’t support that. I was born dumb and its not my fault, it’s
clearly there fault. After hearing her feel sorry for me and irritatingly happy
for her son to make it Goldman sachs I hung up on her. I give a rat’s ass to her
son’s placement. He was fat, with nerd specs and no sex… it was obvious he
would make it big. her call was so annoying that i could not hold back my urge to poison my veins with alcohol so I headed to my friend’s place who is having a blast with a live-in
relationship arrangement since he parents shifted to kolkata. She is satisfied
and shows that with weekend parties for her close buddies.. So it’s a crash
point for deprived. She serves us alcohol and all we need to do is tell her how
much we envy her.
Today of all day I feel
alone in her apartment. It’s her live-in partner’s birthday and his friends
have decided to invade our "deprived only crash point". I came here for alcohol
and with 5 down im feeling nice and suddenly the world is a beautiful place. i decided to move to the spacious balcony to get some air and that’s when an unshaved, shabby looking guy with a black shirt and ripped jeans
walks in the balcony after me asking for a lighter and for the first time im happy to be
a smoker. Smoking is a conversation starter .
So he stands next to me taking deep drags from his cigarette and I try my
level best not to stare at him and look like a drunk perv, he was not drop dead gorgeous, just a normal
guy with an unclean look. He choose to ignore me for a along time and because I
have been give this treatment since school time I ignore his ignorance
gracefully. Finally he offered to refill my glass … again a conversation
starter. This is the night when I would pay a standing ovation to my bad
habits.
He returns with a glass of water... suggesting I should gulp it down to prevent my self from decorating the marbles with puke stains and I must say he has a point so I do as im told. Sanity slowly revisits my brain cells and I try to analyse my surroundings… I see people everywhere. Beautiful people in expensive clothes that i choose to ignore when i entered the apartment ; suddenly my grey vest and blue jeans looks outdated. I smell alcohol and cigarette in the air to a point that someone from outside would think the house is on fire but all of them seems to be enjoying and here im standing in a balcony with an almost gorgeous man… now I realize he looks good. to break the awkward silence he tells me he is an art consultant, moved to Delhi recently working for some Japanese client. As he speaks he tries to analyse my reactions and I stay cold… It’s not the first time I’m meeting some good-looking guy with an exciting job so im not surprised to learn this about him and in an instant I’m starting to hate him. Seems like I’m the only one with no job and a pricey MBA degree. He asks me about myself expecting me to shoot something worthy like he did minutes ago but all I could manage is “searching for jobs”. After hearing his he starts narrating an incident from his Barcelona visit where he was robbed and left on the road by a group of people he met on the trip. I knew my revelation about the job search isn’t interesting but he could have said some of the clinched s to me like other always do but he dint and surprisingly that was a relief. We spoke a length about lot of things that night except for my job and I felt good. Not even for a moment I was tempted to sleep with him (may be I have reached a stage of short-term celibacy). We saw the sky clearing and making way for the morning. It was time to go home. So we bid our goodbyes. He dint ask my name and I never asked his yet it was the best nonsensical talk I have had in a really long time.
He returns with a glass of water... suggesting I should gulp it down to prevent my self from decorating the marbles with puke stains and I must say he has a point so I do as im told. Sanity slowly revisits my brain cells and I try to analyse my surroundings… I see people everywhere. Beautiful people in expensive clothes that i choose to ignore when i entered the apartment ; suddenly my grey vest and blue jeans looks outdated. I smell alcohol and cigarette in the air to a point that someone from outside would think the house is on fire but all of them seems to be enjoying and here im standing in a balcony with an almost gorgeous man… now I realize he looks good. to break the awkward silence he tells me he is an art consultant, moved to Delhi recently working for some Japanese client. As he speaks he tries to analyse my reactions and I stay cold… It’s not the first time I’m meeting some good-looking guy with an exciting job so im not surprised to learn this about him and in an instant I’m starting to hate him. Seems like I’m the only one with no job and a pricey MBA degree. He asks me about myself expecting me to shoot something worthy like he did minutes ago but all I could manage is “searching for jobs”. After hearing his he starts narrating an incident from his Barcelona visit where he was robbed and left on the road by a group of people he met on the trip. I knew my revelation about the job search isn’t interesting but he could have said some of the clinched s to me like other always do but he dint and surprisingly that was a relief. We spoke a length about lot of things that night except for my job and I felt good. Not even for a moment I was tempted to sleep with him (may be I have reached a stage of short-term celibacy). We saw the sky clearing and making way for the morning. It was time to go home. So we bid our goodbyes. He dint ask my name and I never asked his yet it was the best nonsensical talk I have had in a really long time.
Sometimes conversation
with strangers are therapeutic. J